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Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Don't Start None - Won't Be None

"Enemies are so stimulating!"

It's the time of year when we count our blessings. One of my blessings is that I have my very own antagonist. It's true! She is reliably insulting whenever she sees me so I believe that qualifies her as my antagonist. She has constructed a narrative in which I am not a serious person and she needs to remind me of this as much as possible. She is also the type of person that points out (in conversation and in print) the super subtle details that make your canned food drive misogynistic or how your house plants are racist. Her "quips" - a generous description because they are not even a lil' bit funny - are exclusively themed around me being a "bimbo" in appearance and thought. I would say that by any objective standard, I am neither. If you don't believe me just ask Dr. Robot - he would love an extra helping of bimbo if it were available.

Perhaps I remind her of a dark-haired girl that pushed her on the playground or the brunette secretary that lured away her sweet, chinless father- STAGE WHISPER -from whom she gets her looks.  I can see how that might be wounding. Truthfully, I know very little about her and I will probably never know the reason(s) she coils up and hisssses when I enter a room. Meh, that's alright. It keeps me on my toes and and lets me feel a little outraged - both important activities to keep the mind and body nimble.

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